While I liked this book, I didn’t love it, and it’s weird because I can’t really put my finger on the why. I think a lot of it stems from the fact that I started out really liking Merit and then, after a couple of chapters, I grew to really dislike her for at least the first half of the book. It felt like she was super whiney and a bit caustic. I had a really difficult time understanding her, but then about halfway through the book we learn she suffers from depression, which turned things around for me, but not enough to make me end up loving the book.

.Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t hate it. It’s definitely an interesting read, and this is a family that you won’t soon forget. I love that Merit likes to go buy herself a trophy from a thrift shop whenever something random or disappointing happens to her. It all started when the guy she was dating broke up with her after making out with her. She stole his championship football trophy as she left his bedroom and her obsession begins.

Merit describing this actually made me laugh out loud. In the first chapter, she thinks, “There I was, enjoying his hand on my boob, and all the while he was thinking of how he never wanted his hand on my boob again.” Further down in the paragraph, she writes, “That district championship football trophy was actually the start of my collection. From there, I’d pick up random trophies from garage sales or thrift shops any time something shitty happened.”

And that she does. She’s about to purchase a beauty pageant trophy for herself when she runs into a random dude who follows her out of the store and kisses her. It catches her off guard – she doesn’t even know this guy. And then his phone rings and he answers it and is confused because – as he tells the person on the phone – she’s standing right in front of him. That’s when Merit realizes he thought she was her perfect twin sister, Honor.

Now all Merit can do is think about this guy, Sagan and how much she wants to kiss him again, but she can’t because he’s obviously dating her twin sister which is a shock because Honor usually only dates guys who are on their deathbed.

Sound morbid? It is a little bit. The entire family is a bit of a mess. They live in a church that their father bought to spite the former pastor and then converted it into a house. Their father cheated on their mother when she was being treated for cancer with her nurse, got the nurse pregnant and married her. To make things even crazier, their mom lives with them, but she never leaves her private sanctuary in the basement. Their older brother harbors a secret that only Merit knows, and when her stepmother’s younger brother suddenly shows up needing a place to live, Merit doesn’t think things could get much worse until Sagan – the mystery boy who kissed her, also moves in. Now what will she do? She’s already been thinking about him nonstop. Just when things seem like they can’t get much worse, Merit happens to learn several family secrets that almost push her over the edge.

The family is definitely quirky, and there is no shortage of drama and unexpected twists along the way. I felt like the subject matter was definitely handled with care – especially the mental health aspect – and the story was enjoyable, it just felt like a lot, but maybe that was the point. Maybe the intent was to make the reader feel overwhelmed to get us into Merit’s head a little more. If that was the case, it definitely worked.

While it isn’t at the top of my “must read Colleen Hoover” books, I still enjoyed it well enough.